Gratitude

This week before we prayed at lunch, Mike asked the kids to share about a blessing in their life. We were both shocked to see all three of them begin to squirm, eventually becoming irritated. One claimed to not be able to think of anything, while the other two tried to cop out with answers of "air" and "life." Well, those responses didn't sit well with us! I actually became angry, thinking about how much their lives had changed in the past year. I took a deep breath and asked, "You can't think of ANYTHING that you are thankful for?" The conversation took a nasty turn and one of our precious children was sent to their room without eating lunch. (Guess you should have been thankful for the food on the table!) I decided it was time to take inventory of some of the "blessings" at their disposal...and as I packed up the TV/DVD remotes and the video game controls, I thought, "I guess they want to learn the hard way!"

I began to reflect on how God must feel as He pours out blessings on His children. (As a parent, I know I can't question why He would resort to other measures to attract our attention!) The wonderful things He has done in my life have accomplished very little in comparison to the horrendous pain of watching my mom die of cancer. Now again, through the daily anguish of trying to break through the barriers around my children's hearts, His Spirit is ever present and I experience the power of His amazing love that at times seems elusive. Just as I desire the best for my children, how much more is He willing to do to capture our hearts? To ensure that our trust lies only in Him? Please pray for our family as Mike and I continue to navigate this journey.

Life's Transitions

Last night, all three of our kids were upset with us because they had to study. I told Lindsay, "Some things you won't understand until you have your own children." She quickly retorted, "I'm not going to have any children," to which I replied, "That's what I thought, too...but sometimes God has other plans!"

God has a knack for throwing curveballs every now and then. You are heading down a road, thinking you know exactly where you are headed, and suddenly you realize you have no idea where you are. Coming to Brazil, serving at CLM orphanage, adopting three children...all easy decisions because God's voice was crystal clear and we knew we needed to be obedient. Suddenly, I am a mom of three adolescents, and things have become a little blurry!

Adoption is an emotional roller coaster that has my stomach in knots most days. Joy, sadness, pride, anger, anticipation, worry...sometimes all in the same hour! I am daily reminded of God's extreme patience and love for us, His adopted children. The uncertainty of what new issue will cause a blood pressure spike tomorrow, if we'll have enough money to pay our bills next month, or where we'll be living next year...causes me to cling to the Lord more than ever before. I'm afraid that means that He likes when my life is unpredictable because He reiterates that He is my constant, my rock, and my source. He will continue to throw me curveballs, and during each of these transitions in my life, I will learn more about being His child.

By Your Side

Why are you striving these days?
Why are you trying to earn grace?
Why are you crying?
Let me lift up your face
Don't turn away
Why are you looking for love?
Why are you still searching
as if I'm not enough?
To where will you go, child?
Tell me, to where will you run?
Where will you run?

Because I'll be by your side
Wherever you've fallen
Dead of night
Whenever you're calling
Please don't fight
These hands that are holding you.
My hands are holding you
Look at these hands and my side
They swallowed the grave on that night
When I drank the world's sin
So I could carry you in and give you life
I want to give you life.

Because I'll be by your side
Wherever you've fallen
Dead of night
Whenever you're calling
Please don't fight
These hands that are holding you.
My hands are holding you.

'Cause I, I love you
I want you to know
that I, I love you
I'll never let you go.
--Tenth Avenue North

"Reaching the World, Three Children at a Time"

I can't believe it has been a year since we shared with you about God's leading to adopt Ben, Jenna, and Lindsay. They have changed so much, inside and out...but I think Mike and I have changed even more. I never imagined the emotional toll these three would have on my heart, which I've always worn on my sleeve. I find myself (daily) crying out to the Lord for understanding, to remind me of who I am in Him, and to reassure me once again, that He called us to do this incredibly frustrating, wonderful, overwhelming, life-changing thing called adoption.

We moved off of CLM campus last month so that Ben, Jenna, and Lindsay could have a fresh start. We anticipated that the transition (new house, new school, new church, new friends) would be a challenge for them but we underestimated how it would affect us. Living with and loving 30+ other children as your own for 3 years and then realizing God wants you to focus on only three of them has been difficult. This past year, Mariane, Maria Luiza, Caroline, Carolaine, Donei, Luana, Geovane, Patricia, and Romulo also said goodbye to CLM, each leaving a void in our lives, as well as in the lives of the other children and missionaries. We pray and trust in God's best for each one but there is still an emptiness that remains. Although we have been back to visit CLM, we recognize that our kids need to know that they are our priority. We have invited their two best friends from CLM, Lucas and Maria Joana as our first weekend visitors in our new home. Pray for us to know how to navigate future contact with the orphanage and how it affects our kids and their bonding with us.

Each day, Mike and I find ourselves planning the next strategic step in addressing the special needs of each of our children. They each have developmental gaps in varying degrees, and for this season, our primary goal is to provide a predictable, consistent, and safe environment for them. Next month, the adoption will (FINALLY!)be finalized and we are excited to begin an official countdown of Ben, Jenna, and Lindsay's two-year journey to become American citizens! Although we are hoping to get them back sooner to meet family and friends, it has been confirmed because of our unique situation, we need to live here for two years before they can legally enter the U.S. without tourist visas. It isn't what I would have planned...but I'm believing that it is best for each of them and that God will use this time to bond us together as a family.

Thank you so much for your continued prayers and financial support. When we started down this path four years ago, God laid on our hearts a phrase for our mission, "Reaching the World, One Child at a Time." We never imagined the road would lead us to inviting three of those children into our home. Your support, more than ever before, is truly touching the lives of Ben, Jenna, and Lindsay. We praise God for each of you and all that you have done to make this possible.

Blessings!

Luana's New Family

Last Friday, Luana said goodbye to CLM and hello to her new life in Sao Paulo. Her new mom came by bus in the morning, completed the necessary paperwork at the courthouse, and left with her daughter in the afternoon. I was blessed to have some one-on-one time with Lu the day before, when I picked her up from school to have lunch together. She spent most of the time on my lap which made it even more difficult to hold back the tears as I shared with her how happy I was that God had chosen a family for her. I was caught again in the paradox of realizing that I had prayed for three years for a forever family for this precious little girl but my heart still was not ready to let go. I had hoped that our friends, Steve and Tammy would be her parents and that she would be a part of our lives forever. Please pray for Luana as she begins her new life and for Steve and Tammy as they grieve the loss of a child.

Luana

Our precious little Luana was finally released for adoption last week, after being at CLM for three years. Our close friends, Steve and Tammy from Canton, have been desperately praying for this moment, wanting Luana to be a part of their family. They were here last August to adopt Donei and are prepared to return if Luana becomes available for international adoption. It is law, however, that children are available first to Brazilians and a couple has already expressed their interest. Please pray with us that God's perfect will is done and Luana is matched with her perfect forever family.

The Cochran Five!

It's been almost a year since we invited Ben, Jenna, and Lindsay into our family...but we finally have the guardianship! After meeting individually with each of the kids on Friday, the judge told us that he would finalize the adoption in two months. It is customary with Brazilian adoptions to have a six month period but he said that it wouldn't be necessary since we had already been living together at CLM. This means that we can get the kids' passports and start the process of visas in May...and begin to plan their first trip to the U.S.! Please continue to pray for us as we begin to research the next step in this journey.

More T-Shirts!

We received a surprise package last week filled with tye-dye shirts for all the kids! They were made by the youth group at First Friends Church in Canton who have been faithfully praying for our kids. Thank you, Joel, Chrissy, and all who helped with this fun blessing!

"Eagles" at CLM

Our friends, Tammy and Steve have been back in Ohio now for almost seven months and Donei has adjusted well to his new home. He's doing well in school, is involved at church and youth group, and was a star on his soccer team. He's even been asked to come out for the football team next year as their kicker. His English is so good, he is actually forgetting some of his Portuguese already! Donei's soccer team sent these t-shirts for the kids--even our little ones wanted one! Please continue to pray for Donei and his new family.

Could this be the week?!?!

For those who have been following our journey, you probably noticed that we weren't rejoicing 10 days after my last blog entry! :( If you can believe it, the judge left again on vacation, promising me that he would pass everything along to the other judge and asking us to return in "TEN MORE DAYS." Well, on the tenth day, we returned to the courthouse to find that nothing had been done. However, our social worker had returned from vacation and assured us that all she needed was the judge's signature and she would do everything she could to get us the guardianship this week. Although the last 11 months have been frustrating at times, we are so thankful that we were able to "unofficially" start our family last April. We are believing in faith that Ben, Jenna, and Lindsay will officially be ours in the next few days! Thank you for standing with us in prayer.

Progress!

Since Luciana, our social worker, is on vacation, we took the opportunity to speak to the judge directly. I wrote a letter, explaining our situation, in case I wasn't able to meet personally with him...but after two hours of "patiently" waiting at the courthouse, he ushered me into his office. I quickly discovered that he was very aware of every detail of our situation...except the U.S. law that requires a two-year waiting period after receiving the guardianship before Ben, Jenna, and Lindsay can obtain U.S. citizenship. He immediately stood and asked me to follow him. We walked to Luciana's office where he gave instructions to another social worker and told her to make our case her priority. (LOVED that!) He explained to me that the district attorney was the next step in our process but if all went well, we would have the guardianship in TEN DAYS! Please continue to pray with us!

Adoption Update

Many of you have emailed, anxiously waiting with us to see if anything has happened with the adoption. We were told the process would be "simple," once we received our permanent visa...I'm wondering if that has another significance in Portuguese?! Mike's visa was approved in October, but not posted until December....by the time we knew about it, the guy at the police station was on vacation for a month so we had to wait for him to return to print the document. In the meantime, the judge went on vacation and didn't get back until January 17th. As soon as he returned, we discovered that the social worker we had been working with for 16 months...WAS ON VACATION! We were strongly reminded again that God's ways are not our ways! :) We know He is in control and His plans will not be thwarted. We are embracing what He has for us in this moment, grateful that we have the opportunity to enjoy this time with the kids. Your prayers are greatly appreciated! :)

New Strength

Don't you know that the Lord is the everlasting God, the creator of all the earth? He never grows faint or weary. No one can measure the depths of His understanding. He gives power to those who are tired and worn out; he offers strength to the weak. Even youths will become exhausted, and young men will give up. But those who wait on the Lord will find new strength. They will fly high on wings like eagles. They will run and not grow weary. They will walk and not faint. Isaiah 40: 28-31 New Living Translation

2010 was definitely a year of waiting on the Lord for us. I have felt "tired and worn out" many times but am so thankful for the assurance that my God is the everlasting God, the creator of all the earth! He hears the faintest cry of our heart and responds with exactly what we need, exactly when we need it. The last nine months as instant parents of three adolescents have been the most challenging and rewarding of my life. I praise God that He chose us for Ben, Jenna, and Lindsay's forever family!

The judge returns from vacation on January 17th and we hope to meet with him to obtain legal guardianship for the adoption. Please continue to pray for God's favor with the judge as we take the next step in this process!

Our Permanent Visa Has Been Approved!

Long story short...it was actually approved on October 5th but wasn't posted until December! I guess that is to be expected when we've waited 20 months! We quickly contacted the social worker that has been working with our case...but were told that she couldn't meet with us until the following week. Then, at the meeting, she informs us that she can't set up our first interview until December 20th. When we told her that we had hoped to be in Guarapuava before school started in February, she said there were no guarantees. This was very frustrating considering it was last December that she told us that once we had our visa, the adoption process would be very simple and only take a few days. Anyway, we were pretty disappointed but sat down afterwards and gave everything to the Lord again, trusting in His perfect timing. About halfway home, we were rounding a sharp curve and a car went left of center into our lane. The car in front of us swerved as the other car hit the back of them and started coming directly head on towards us. Mike swerved to the right as we were pelted by the debris from the collision and just barely missed being hit. Two men, a woman, and two children got out of the car in front of us after we both pulled over. I went to hug her and told her that I thanked God for protecting all of us and her eyes just filled with tears as she clung to me. After everything was resolved with the driver of the other vehicle, Mike and I were reminded again that He is in total control! It was beautiful to see how wonderfully He cares for us and protects us. Thank you for your prayers for God's perfect timing of our adoption!

HAIL AT CLM?!

Last week, we experienced something that has never happened at CLM...without even rain in the forecast, we were pummelled with hail for almost an hour! Although we've seen hail here before, it has only lasted for a few minutes before the sun pops back out and quickly melts it away. This time, however, we had enough to have an "iceball fight," make "ice angels," and build an "iceman!" (If you have time, check out the video that others have posted at http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rW8bQNG0F4Q). Everyone had a blast while it lasted but unfortunately, there was quite a bit of damage done to some homes and businesses in the colony and crops that had recently been planted. Thank you for praying for those who were affected.

Saying Goodbye

Our last night with the Columbus team was chaotic but fun...imagine playing Bunco with 28 people, with only a few people who understood how to play?! Throw in three kids under the age of five, 30 minutes of explaining directions, Rice Krispie Treats, prizes...there were lots of laughs but also a few headaches by the end of the night! We are so thankful for Sue, Colleen, Teresa and Lauren...their generosity and servants' hearts blessed us beyond words.

The Fun Continues!

After the kids enjoyed a short swim in the pool, we roasted hot dogs and marshmallows for dinner and enjoyed time with them near the fire.

A Day at the Park

We are enjoying an unusual weekend at CLM...only seven of our 24 children were here today! Geovane and Patricia are visiting their aunt and uncle and nine of our adolescents went to a weekend retreat at Turvo with Viktoria, Kevin and Elaine. We took the remaining 13 kids to the park this morning to have our Sunday morning children's service and a picnic lunch...and then six of them left to spend the day in Turvo with Fabio and Edit. With the team from Ohio here with us, it made a wonderful adult-child ratio--we actually outnumbered the kids! We praise God for this special day for them and pray that the Holy Spirit ministers to our teens at the retreat.

The CLM Team

These pictures are a testimony to God's faithfulness. For years, we have prayed for God to send more missionaries to CLM...and we are now enjoying the "problem" of having all of our missionary homes occupied! Last October, Jake and Amanda returned to serve and in 2010, Edit and Fabio, Katie and Andy, and Kevin and Elaine joined the CLM team. Last month, Patrick returned for another five month stay and this week, Teresa, Lauren, Sue and Colleen are back for another two weeks. It is a blessing to be a part of the awesome work that God is doing, "changing the world, one child at a time!" Thanks so much for your continued prayers, encouragement, and support!

Visitors!

Thank you so much for continuing to check out our blog...even when I've been SO negligent at keeping it up-to-date! :( How long can I use the "new mom with three adolescents" excuse?!?! I promise to do better!

Patrick has returned for another 5+ months and he has jumped right back in to CLM life, without missing a beat. His parents, Ted and Sue were able to come with him for a two week visit and they have captured Patrick's passion for the kids and the ministry. They had a rough start with a flight delay, that turned worse when the airline lost three of their bags. They were troopers and didn't let it affect them, as they made the most of each day with our precious children. Please pray that this special couple is able to return soon...and that their missing luggage will be found!

Katie's sister, Emma has been with us for three months now and will return to the states tomorrow. She has been an enormous blessing to Andy and Katie, helping to take care of their newborn son, Joseph. Please pray for safe travels for her.