Our children, I'm sure like many others, struggle with control issues, many times, to their own detriment. I have read this is a very normal response for children who have lived in unsafe, unpredictable environments...being in control diminishes your chances of becoming a victim. We've been trying to help them understand that letting us be in control doesn't mean, "we win, they lose," but instead, that we could all win.
I was recently convicted that I was the one who was losing...I had lost my joy. I had allowed their moods to control my feelings. When they were up, I was up; when they were down, I was WAY down. I had interpreted their attitudes and actions as personal attacks towards me, believing that I should be able to do something to elicit a different response. "What am I doing wrong? It's my fault they aren't happy." I realized that focusing on the Holy Spirit's work in me was the answer to changing the situation around me. When Paul encouraged us in 1 Thessalonians 5:16 to "be joyful always," he knew it would be impossible if we looked outside ourselves. But if we can train ourselves to look at what God is doing in us, and realize that trials and tribulations (everything outside of our control) are the tools He uses to help us relinquish control, we can find joy in every circumstance. Only God can change hearts and I praise Him for the miraculous work He has already done and promises to complete in our children's lives.
1 comment:
You need a "like" button! This was great. I needed the reminder - Thanks!
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